Courage and Faith

This passage from today's reading in the Upper Room Disciplines:

Based on Ps 127, as well as this week's reading in Ruth:

"Courage is an element of trust, and trust is an element of faith.  Faith is the underpinning of holy risk.  In the face of doubts and despair, in the presence of foes and fears, the faith that is our heritage from God, God's great gift and blessing, provides courage and confidence." (Martha Highsmith)

I have taken on many different "jobs" during my life.  As I think about courage and faith, I realize that when I have spoken up and volunteered to do something just beyond my confort level, it has been with the base of knowing that it is OK to fail - and that comes ,I BELEIVE, from the knowledge that I AM LOVED - and isn't that the gift of Grace?

And isn't it the love of others that gives us the lift to do things?  I am thinking this AM about getting ready and going to the church to help prepare for tomorrows dinner - and all the other things I have to do - prepare the cards for the congregation to sign, bake breads for pastor for the veterans on Sunday- exercise, and maybe get in a walk.  Then there is all this mess around our house to clean up from the storm.

And knitting projects to be accomplished, and the Prayer Shawl group.  My mind is a whirl of things to do.  But then I am lead back to "why me" - why am I the one to push the prayer shawl ministry?  Why am I the one to bake the bread?  fix the cards, etc.  Sure, part of the answer is "why not you?" - but my constant prayer is to be part of the solution, not part of the problem.

God has put many people in my life to be my "support staff" - to be my encouragers.  I think back to Susan Pickering's parents - they thought I was worthy of taking into their lives and on their boat - and gave me things to do.  Lorita Duffield thought I was worth the effort to lead me to become a nurse.  Mrs. Chaffey thought enough of me to allow me to be supervisor - in charge of the Broaddus Hospital.  Norma Workman had faith in me to nurture me in OR.  Joy Don took me into a larger environment in both WVUH and the world of AORN.  I could go on an on...up to Alicia-

Alicia had faith in me to nurture my faith, to have me lead a group of others in the Prayer shawl ministry.  To have us care for their daughter through her senior year in high school.  And now I am considered a strong part of Crim UMC.  Tonya thinks I am worth the effort to teach me in bells, and the friends I have made through the church are beyond the basic word friend.  We are family- family in Christ's body.

Which leads me back to courage and faith.  Because of my faith, I have the courage to make the "sweet tea" - to prepare back packs bags, to listen to God and make notes on cards.  Thank you folks and God especially for your ongoing support.

I like Alicia's ending......To God be the Glory 

Monday morning

King wanted me to be up way earlier than I did this morning.  Of course he succeeded in getting me out of bed, but I shut him out of the bedroom for a few extra minutes.  But I am glad to be up before the sun tops over the hill and to see the sunlight through the trees light up my neighbors first.  Thanks be to God for sunlight streaming in.

Today I read a passage from Job, (42:1-6) and again am reminded of the expression that we want to have a relationship with God, but we want to be the advisors - hmm.  I think I struggle the very  most with not my will, but "THY will be done".  I am not sure why the need to be in control is so strong in me.  I do not see myself as a born leader - I think I am more support person, cheerleader, facilitator, but I accept that those terms sometimes mean taking the lead actions. 

Yesterday (as many days) I struggled with doing too much vs walking away.  I really want to go away for a few days, and felt like others were asking me to take on addition tasks - what to do with the turkeys for the Bazaar, what to do with and for the back pack feeding project.  Get the Pampered chef stuff taken care of (and be sure not to leave anyone out for fear of hurting someone's feelings....).

As I sat in the front listening to the pianist play quiet music for the prelude, I truly surrendered and sat quietly, and asked God to lead me and calm me.  Of course it worked.  I was then reasonably calm to start our service with annoucements and then the start of worship.

I guess that is the same thing I did when I surrendered this morning, got up and sat here quietly with my morning devotion time and watched the sun light up our neighborhood.  It is now high enough to be in my eyes as I sit here at the kitchen table, and I feel prepared to face the day and the world, knowing that God literally has my back, and with Him, all things are possible.  Even tons of tasks to include walking and exercise.

Thanks be to God.

Weather and servant

Yesterday was a beautiful weather day.  A bit cool in the AM as I took my walk - the brilliant blue sky of fall.  As we drove north the colors of the trees were vivid.  Truly at peak in my mind, with several trees down to bare "bones" already. 

After we were done with our appointment we then stalled a bit a the mall, and met up with our son, his wife and their grandchild at a local restaurant for supper.  The baby was fussier than normal.  He had been to a new sitter, and was either or both tired and hungry.  As I think this AM, I guess we are all a bit out of sorts when we are either tired or hungry and certainly both.  As this young child depended on his grandparents to know what he needed to make him happy, so I depend on God to know what I need.  I mean, after all, isn't He omniscient, omnipotent and omnipresent? 

But then I am reminded of the prayer we are all taught "our father which art in Heaven"- Hmm, Our father, maybe that means I need to be a bit patient - maybe someone else's need is a tad more important than mine?  And then, that of course leads back to today's reading in Mark (10:35-45) and servant leadership.

So, let me today be a patient, servant leader.  Let me be in a state of constant prayer for not just myself but for others.  May I again today pray to be the best me I can be to serve and be an example to others. 

Thanks be to God

Bone tired

I've had two very full and fulfilling days, and I am bone tired.  Well, actually it was three days of being busy if I really think about it. 

I like to be and keep busy.  I have attended three different "church" services in the last 24 hours.  We in WV welcomed our new Bishop Sandra Steiner Ball.  The ceremony was held in Wesley Chapel at WV Wesleyan College.  A moving ceremony and great sermon on "God Still Speaks".  As she was speaking I increasingly wondered how much I might be missing if I am not intentionally paying attention and listening.  I was sitting in a pew with several of the most important people in my life.  What do I miss with them if I am too busy with my own agenda and not paying attention??

We had a good sermon today in church as well.  I cannot hide from God  and I am fooling only myself if I think I can.  But the GOOD NEWS is that I can not sin enough to banish God - God's grace is greater than all our sin.  Guess it is up to me to pay better attention and have better intentions.

This afternoon I participated in "charge conference" and hear a third sermon.  Our D.S, sought to give us 7 key ideas for becoming Fruitful Congregations using the same letter of the alphabet, though he admitted it was hard to do.  He used the letter P, and almost succeeded, but on the last word he summed up a lot of what we as churches need to do to be growing and fruitful - we need to be Phlexible.  -  He used a quote that we were not to let the fear of "striking out keep us from coming up to bat". 

I am forever grateful for the opportunities to volunteer in service to my church and have made some of the best friends in the company of believers-  truly we ARE and are to be the Body of Christ. 

And with those thoughts, will say "good night"

Thoughts while walking today

It has been quite a while since I last wrote on this blog.  I have always thought this was a private thing, but as we set up our new computer (laptop), I realized that it is possible others might actually read this.  Hum.

So my current reading is The Heretic's Daughter by Kathleen Kent.  Hard to believe people lived such hard lives.  People today think they have it rough, but I don't know of anyone in our country that has to melt ice from a frozen river to have water in the winter.  Or sit huddled in a blanket while someone mends their only shirt...  as kids say, "just sayin' ".

My current knitting includes working on three different prayer shawls, a sweater for a young child for Christmas and of course a pair of socks.  Have several completed, dedicated prayer shawls that need to get the folks we made them for.

Got the sign board for church made up today - not really enough letters to say what I wanted, but it is a start.  Found more letters on Amazon cheaper than anywhere else.  IF not approved, to purchase, I can return them.

I find it hard to believe all the storage units available for rent these days.  While the amount of things I have acquired has taken over the space our kids used to need, I can't quite understand the need for all the storage buildings.

So now it is time for dinner.  Bye all.

Discouraged

Feeling sort of discouraged today.  The walking thing seems like the only thing I am losing is sleep.  Up when I wake each morning - I have only missed one day other than my Sunday rest days, and yesterday's weight was up 2 lbs.

Also continue to feel discouraged that I/we put so much effort into maintaining relationships with others, and it seems like no one then can be bothered to come by here to check on us.  Should I set specific date invitations?  Admittedly, I am not good at just stopping by, except doing so in Buckhannon.

And I am discouraged in that I miss what I am going to call "spiritual direction".  I miss the opportunities to explore what God might be saying to me - I can not depend on Alicia for that, she has made it very plain to me that she is now family, not my pastor.  And I am having a difficult time with Tim as my spiritual  director.  I don't think that his alignment in pastoring.  I want more that a bible study of what did it mean, and more of what does it me to me, to my life now.  Gotta keep searching for that.

All of which makes me feel very self-centered.  Other people have real problems, and I whine because I feel left out.  I am very frustrated by the fact that I can not train, much less contain the grapevine that is overtaking everything, and the multiflora rose.  Fallen trees that have (some of them) lain uncut for years.  Poison ivy that is overtaking too much of our "yard" with no one caring but me, but I get "I'll take care of that" when I complain..... but nothing is ever done.

OK, I have ranted on enough.  Time to get off my duff and do a bit of that trimming around the driveway, then I can clean  up.  I may be the only one that cares or notices, but I am someone and I am important if not to anyone else, to me and to God.

grousing - well whining

OK, this being out of electricity and running the generator is really getting old, but I am very grateful to be able to do that.  So far, we lost electricity on 6/29 about 7:30PM, got power back on Sunday 7/1 at 7:40 PM and then lost it in a storm at 10:40pm.  On calling Mon power I was told they knew of our outage and reported to me the number I had been assigned on Friday PM.  -

On MOnday 7/2 I again called in with no power and again the original number was reported to me.  Of course all of this is via computer.  I am uneasy that some one will come along and note that our original outage had been cleared and remove us from the list of concerns.  I know Sam has been in communication with his close friend John Cutright who is assessor and part of what I consider to be people in the know.

Tuesday I met up with Susie Cvechko in the grocery store and she commented that in an assessment meeting with the Com Center there had been no mention of outage on Union road.  Tues PM went to VBS and it was nice to be out of the house for a while, but hot on return.

July 4 we did make a trip to Alicia's and took King.  Nice to have a few hours away from the house, but of course it was almost dark, hot and stuffy when we got home.  House never did get cool for the night.

Thursday I called the power company AGAIN and this time was given another new number - again makes me feel like we had been overlooked.  House at bedtime in high 80's - fan gives little respite.  Washed clothes and hung them on the drying rack outside -

Friday, called power company again and given same (newer) number.  Recording says they hope to have all of Barbour County on by Sunday PM.  Went to VBS.  Temp in LR at bedtime is 88.

Saturday Dewey calls to tell me there is a switch thrown on a pole by the Independence Church.  Of course all I get from the Power company is the same recorded nonsense.  Sam assures me he had talked to a human being and they were aware of our issue.  I gave up and called the Com Center and a person there said there were trucks staged in the County at Tacy and they would be sure the folks got our message about the switch - they were aware this outage in the Indepenece area.  For me to call when I got power and if I did not to call back in 4-5 hrs and let them know.  I called back at 4PM or so and told them.  Have seen power repair trucks past our house today for the first time.  Found at at the store that there has been no power up the Independence "holler" at all since the storm on Friday and there are lines down in the field which have been reported.  Keith and I spent time on the back deck as the heat is still bad there but not in the sun and some breeze.  When I went in to fix us some dinner, I found a message from Com Center that we should have power by 8PM and if we did not to call again and they would again see if something could be done.  As we were getting ready to go buy more gas to fill and run the generator through the night for the first time due to now oppressive heat - we were going to run a fan in the BR through the night- power came on about 7:55PM.  Halleluia!

After a fairly normal night, minus generator and house finally cooled to the 75 degrees, and the air conditioner is running quite a bit, we went to town to eat about 2PM, another hard storm hit and when we came home we again had NO POWER!  I called Mon Power, second number is repeated as if never better (never did get a call telling us the power was on, btw).  Called the Com center and after I asked if they had any more miracles, again said our power was off and I was not sure the company would pick it  up.

So, here it is 9PM, back on the generator, so far about$100 spent on fuel, and we face another indeterminate period of time without power.  We have heard that some of the folks further up the road (that had power from Sunday to today) have had power returned, and others have not.  Some have never yet had power issues.  I am fed up, have no idea where else to turn, am tired of feeling slighted and am just plan bitchy.  I know there are people worse off than I, I know the power company folks are working hard in all this heat, but if I could have a human say they will help take care of the problem i would be much happier. 

End of rant - for now at least.