One of the blogs that I follow, the writer selects a word to guide her year. I have considered this in other years, and not really taken it seriously, I guess. But this year I am going to give it a better shot, and I figure by committing it to this format, I will have a reminder.
So with that in mind, I am choosing (or did God choose for me-?-) the word,TRUST, as in Trust and Obey. I need to trust my instincts to act and to wait. Trust that I am enough - trust that I am loved for myself, trust that I can "do all things through Christ that strengthens me".
In my desire to be perfect - to seek affirmation- I my come on too strong. I wait for someone else to call me, then make the phone call. So, in my seeking to trust, how much is my will, and how much is Thy Will?
In these moments and coming days, I will seek to trust more and more - even for something as small as connecting to other bloggers by listing the ones I "follow" on this blogger page.
TRUST - in God we trust, ... trust and obey for there is not other way....
Friday, January 3, 2014
Thursday, December 19, 2013
Contemplating on a word
Today I read an Advent devotion on "Just Joe". Related to Joseph's response/reaction to the news that his fiance', Mary was pregnant. His response was to be "just" - in another version, "righteous". So that made with word "adjust" come to my mind. And from "adjust" I then thought of "adduction". If "adduction", is a medical term for bringing a limb towards the center, then when we "adjust" something, do we bring it more into being right/correct? How often have I heard or said that someone needed an "attitude adjustment"? Here comes judging Jane again. Seems like I spend a lot of time asking for forgiveness for my judging.....
Here in Advent, I am trying, especially in my quiet time, to focus on being prepared for the coming of Christ. In a sense, then, one might extrapolate that I am trying to adjust my attitude to a more right frame of mind, to not be distracted by all the things I think society expects me to do and to be. To be simply (just?) Jane and open to the leading of the Holy Spirit.
And I have been spending a lot of time recently trying to decide if I would describe my attitude during my morning quiet time as contemplating or being contemplative.
And have I ever remarked before that I love words - ?
Thank you Lord, that I love words and have an active mind/thought pattern. Maybe it's no so bad for my mind to wander..... maybe that is being contemplative.
Here in Advent, I am trying, especially in my quiet time, to focus on being prepared for the coming of Christ. In a sense, then, one might extrapolate that I am trying to adjust my attitude to a more right frame of mind, to not be distracted by all the things I think society expects me to do and to be. To be simply (just?) Jane and open to the leading of the Holy Spirit.
And I have been spending a lot of time recently trying to decide if I would describe my attitude during my morning quiet time as contemplating or being contemplative.
And have I ever remarked before that I love words - ?
Thank you Lord, that I love words and have an active mind/thought pattern. Maybe it's no so bad for my mind to wander..... maybe that is being contemplative.
Thursday, November 28, 2013
Happy Thanksgiving 2013
I am struck this morning, an all American holiday, about the deep thread of religion in our history. As I read Psalm 100 this morning ( and I confess, I was excited to realize I not only could recite it, but knew it was Psalm 100 -), I saw an instant connect between "it is He that has made us and not we ourselves" and "We are endowed by our Creator ..". Yes, I thought to myself, we are not self made - we are made in the image of the creator.
There Bible was recorded as the document of the people of Israel. And the time it was recorded, that was the world as those people knew it. In the Declaration of Independence there is no mention of a brand of religion. No mention of a Christian God or a Muslim God. An undefined supreme being, "our Creator".
Over my entire life, and more recognizably in the last 8 years, I have recognized I was (and am) created and nurtured by an all loving God.
Today is a historic moment in the life of the American Jews. A coming together of their "church and state" in that Hanukkah and Thanksgiving. Thanksgiving Akuh (?). My sister has a Menurkey - a turkey that will hold the nine candles of a menorah. Yet our traditional ancestors - the ones we celebrate as having "discovered" and settle America, were devout Christians who were escaping the Church of England so they could pursue the freedom to worship as they chose.
In my mind, all is God created - and the God I choose to worship is a triune God - God the Father (and yes,I see God in the masculine), God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit. God loves me, no matter what. And especially today, for that I am indeed thankful.
There Bible was recorded as the document of the people of Israel. And the time it was recorded, that was the world as those people knew it. In the Declaration of Independence there is no mention of a brand of religion. No mention of a Christian God or a Muslim God. An undefined supreme being, "our Creator".
Over my entire life, and more recognizably in the last 8 years, I have recognized I was (and am) created and nurtured by an all loving God.
Today is a historic moment in the life of the American Jews. A coming together of their "church and state" in that Hanukkah and Thanksgiving. Thanksgiving Akuh (?). My sister has a Menurkey - a turkey that will hold the nine candles of a menorah. Yet our traditional ancestors - the ones we celebrate as having "discovered" and settle America, were devout Christians who were escaping the Church of England so they could pursue the freedom to worship as they chose.
In my mind, all is God created - and the God I choose to worship is a triune God - God the Father (and yes,I see God in the masculine), God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit. God loves me, no matter what. And especially today, for that I am indeed thankful.
Tuesday, October 29, 2013
Contentment and Impatience
Maybe I should have titled this success and failure. This AM I read the chapter on Success in Joan Chittester's book The Gift of Years Growing Older Gracefully. I certainly am not a success at family. My children rarely call, and frequently are not available when I call them. My grandchildren prefer electronic communication - the two that communicate - and seem to prefer to do that in social media. I have one brother than seems to prefer to be isolated in terms of communication and another with which I have infrequent communication. And my sister loves to talk but it seems only when I call her.
I have debated with myself if I am depressed. I don't think so - I think I am tired of making all the effort. My husband is content to have little outside contact - his idea of the ideal vacation spot is one that has free wi-fi and good tv reception. Many days our phone does not ring at all - and if it does, it is someone trying to sell us something or on some idea (think politician....).
I see the beauty of this changing season and am almost fearful of the next season of snow and potential isolation. I want to be doing things - improving the way our property looks, visiting with others, sharing new yarn I have gotten, the progress on projects, the way the spirit works in mysterious ways.
I am certainly not content with everything in my life. I am impatient to see progress - get the trimming done, have the apples canned (I did 7 qts apple pie filling yesterday) and have a chance to sit and talk - or walk and talk. I am content that my relationship with my Lord is mine to cultivate, to grow and to be responsive. I am thankful for my health and that of my close relatives.
Maybe I am too impatient with others. Again today, I will pray to be patient - to be open to the leading of the Holy Spirit - in His/Her own time.....
I have debated with myself if I am depressed. I don't think so - I think I am tired of making all the effort. My husband is content to have little outside contact - his idea of the ideal vacation spot is one that has free wi-fi and good tv reception. Many days our phone does not ring at all - and if it does, it is someone trying to sell us something or on some idea (think politician....).
I see the beauty of this changing season and am almost fearful of the next season of snow and potential isolation. I want to be doing things - improving the way our property looks, visiting with others, sharing new yarn I have gotten, the progress on projects, the way the spirit works in mysterious ways.
I am certainly not content with everything in my life. I am impatient to see progress - get the trimming done, have the apples canned (I did 7 qts apple pie filling yesterday) and have a chance to sit and talk - or walk and talk. I am content that my relationship with my Lord is mine to cultivate, to grow and to be responsive. I am thankful for my health and that of my close relatives.
Maybe I am too impatient with others. Again today, I will pray to be patient - to be open to the leading of the Holy Spirit - in His/Her own time.....
Thankfulness
What a beautiful, fall morning. As I started this day, my prayer request was (and is-) that my life have meaning - make a difference. And the hymn "Great is thy faithfulness" is running through my head. Interesting is that the scripture for today in the Upper Room Disciplines, is Psalm 119: 137-144, and the concluding line, vs 144b is: "Give me understanding, and I shall live.".
I had a good overnight retreat last Fri and Sat in Charleston doing a "walk with Jesus" spiritual formation activity. We walked the labyrinth at St. Marks six different times. I can't even describe what it was like. I love the peace of walking in silence. You can always see the center - your goal, and yet there are times when you seem to be "almost there" and you are quite a way from arriving. And then, when you think you are farthest, you are lead right to the center. Is that how it is with some problems in life? When I struggle and think the answer is distant, it is close, and when I surrender and just let it go (Let go and Let God?), that the answer comes? Another observation that stuck with me was that if you are on the journey with others, at one point you will cross each others paths - get in the way? find a way to work around each other?. The only exception was when we met in the center..... hmmm.
This morning the phone rang and it was my daughter. I am disturbed at first by the phone ringing in the midst of "my time"- and I am tickled that she calls to talk. Things can't always be on my terms.... and even good things sometimes come as an interruption. Thanks, R, for being a great "interruption" in my life.
I realize I am struggling, in my personal life, with the desire to do it all, to have it all, but seemingly on my time plan. Life is not like that. I need to do a better job at having the words "Let go and Let God" do a better job of travelling those inches from my head to my heart.
And for all things, I am very thankful. May I share my thanks with all I see. Thanks be to God.
I had a good overnight retreat last Fri and Sat in Charleston doing a "walk with Jesus" spiritual formation activity. We walked the labyrinth at St. Marks six different times. I can't even describe what it was like. I love the peace of walking in silence. You can always see the center - your goal, and yet there are times when you seem to be "almost there" and you are quite a way from arriving. And then, when you think you are farthest, you are lead right to the center. Is that how it is with some problems in life? When I struggle and think the answer is distant, it is close, and when I surrender and just let it go (Let go and Let God?), that the answer comes? Another observation that stuck with me was that if you are on the journey with others, at one point you will cross each others paths - get in the way? find a way to work around each other?. The only exception was when we met in the center..... hmmm.
This morning the phone rang and it was my daughter. I am disturbed at first by the phone ringing in the midst of "my time"- and I am tickled that she calls to talk. Things can't always be on my terms.... and even good things sometimes come as an interruption. Thanks, R, for being a great "interruption" in my life.
I realize I am struggling, in my personal life, with the desire to do it all, to have it all, but seemingly on my time plan. Life is not like that. I need to do a better job at having the words "Let go and Let God" do a better job of travelling those inches from my head to my heart.
And for all things, I am very thankful. May I share my thanks with all I see. Thanks be to God.
Wednesday, September 18, 2013
Just for today
Just for today - that is an ongoing message a friend posts on Facebook as she lifts a concern or prayer.
This morning I woke feeling pretty content - and almost afraid of that sense. Like my mother's expression of "waiting for the other shoe to fall". My husband now has a pain he claims is in his hip, but I sense is in his back. I had a pain in my back a week ago - I called it a "catch" and thought if someone could help me snap it loose I'd be better - but except for turning certain ways, it barely slowed me down. I used some heat therapy and then remembered some muscle relaxants we had, took a one each night for two nights and with that rest felt (and continue to feel) lots's better. Sure hope those pills help him as we are to go away for a couple days soon, and it won't be as much fun if he is in pain.
Yesterday I stayed home all day (unbelievable to some of my friends, I am sure), and had a good day. Today I need to go out - do several things, at least one of which is related to the phone calls I made yesterday.
I have felt more comfortable with myself these last few days. Had a good visit with my spiritual adviser on Monday. He commented on a couple things we discussed that I seemed to be comfortable with decisions I had made as if in better touch with the Holy Spirit. Powerful thought, especially since on at least one of those decisions it related to "backing off" and actually doing less.
So today, my prayers include the family of a young lady that inherited eternal life way too young, have peace, and that my husband listen to his body and heal so that he (and I) can enjoy our lives relatively pain free. And maybe that I remember I do not have to be in control and survive.
Just for today - AMEN
This morning I woke feeling pretty content - and almost afraid of that sense. Like my mother's expression of "waiting for the other shoe to fall". My husband now has a pain he claims is in his hip, but I sense is in his back. I had a pain in my back a week ago - I called it a "catch" and thought if someone could help me snap it loose I'd be better - but except for turning certain ways, it barely slowed me down. I used some heat therapy and then remembered some muscle relaxants we had, took a one each night for two nights and with that rest felt (and continue to feel) lots's better. Sure hope those pills help him as we are to go away for a couple days soon, and it won't be as much fun if he is in pain.
Yesterday I stayed home all day (unbelievable to some of my friends, I am sure), and had a good day. Today I need to go out - do several things, at least one of which is related to the phone calls I made yesterday.
I have felt more comfortable with myself these last few days. Had a good visit with my spiritual adviser on Monday. He commented on a couple things we discussed that I seemed to be comfortable with decisions I had made as if in better touch with the Holy Spirit. Powerful thought, especially since on at least one of those decisions it related to "backing off" and actually doing less.
So today, my prayers include the family of a young lady that inherited eternal life way too young, have peace, and that my husband listen to his body and heal so that he (and I) can enjoy our lives relatively pain free. And maybe that I remember I do not have to be in control and survive.
Just for today - AMEN
Thursday, September 5, 2013
Reflection on Psalm 139 and Hymn #393
I am fearfully and wonderfully made - I was knit together/formed for God's purpose. I need to be still and know what God wants of me - from me- for me.
I am working on the listening and hearing skills. I have been using "Spirit of the Living God" as one of my calming/centering foci. Awhile ago, as I sang that hymn to myself silently, I could not remember the first action phrase, so I looked it up. Interesting to find it is "melt me".
If I am "fearfully and wonderfully made" by the creator, in my mother's womb, then am I not basically perfect? Funny how life gets in the way. So as I sit in silence, not exactly meditating, I need to allow the spirit to enter me and calm me - open me - make me accessible to the working of the spirit, so the phrase "melt me" becomes even more significant. Melt my preconceptions, take away the hardened shell of thinking I know it all. Only by being melted- pliable- can then the following section take place. Mold me. Make me be what You (God) want me to be. First I have to be melted to be pliable to the Maker to mold me.
And isn't that what society is doing to us all. We are melted by our exposure to the world - desensitized to cruel and harsh conditions. Use to seeing people who are hungry- if they just would put their mind to it they could get a job. So we are molded by those around us with self serving attitudes. And it is sometimes difficult to resist buying into that. And I am ashamed to admit I am sure there are times my attitude is no better. But I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Shaped and formed in the image of God to do good to others, to love and serve.
Lord, give me strength to stand up to what I know is wrong and be molded by You for your work. Fill me and use me-
Lord, in your mercy, hear my prayer.
I am working on the listening and hearing skills. I have been using "Spirit of the Living God" as one of my calming/centering foci. Awhile ago, as I sang that hymn to myself silently, I could not remember the first action phrase, so I looked it up. Interesting to find it is "melt me".
If I am "fearfully and wonderfully made" by the creator, in my mother's womb, then am I not basically perfect? Funny how life gets in the way. So as I sit in silence, not exactly meditating, I need to allow the spirit to enter me and calm me - open me - make me accessible to the working of the spirit, so the phrase "melt me" becomes even more significant. Melt my preconceptions, take away the hardened shell of thinking I know it all. Only by being melted- pliable- can then the following section take place. Mold me. Make me be what You (God) want me to be. First I have to be melted to be pliable to the Maker to mold me.
And isn't that what society is doing to us all. We are melted by our exposure to the world - desensitized to cruel and harsh conditions. Use to seeing people who are hungry- if they just would put their mind to it they could get a job. So we are molded by those around us with self serving attitudes. And it is sometimes difficult to resist buying into that. And I am ashamed to admit I am sure there are times my attitude is no better. But I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Shaped and formed in the image of God to do good to others, to love and serve.
Lord, give me strength to stand up to what I know is wrong and be molded by You for your work. Fill me and use me-
Lord, in your mercy, hear my prayer.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)